Random thoughts

Late night thoughts, just airing out the brain, in a manner of speaking. I love Doctor Who. I have watched it since I was a child with my father. We spent hours at night watching it aired on either a Canadian station or PBS using an over air antenna. On clear summer nights, we could get stations from over the lake from Canada. Those and PBS were the channels we watched most nights. Dad suffered from insomnia, and even when it wasn't an issue he worked night shifts so he was used to it. I remember so many summer nights spent watching stuff, listening to him play guitar and sing, or just listening to him talking about his childhood. All of that to say a certain episode of Doctor Who has popped up in my mind lately. It seems to be sticking around for some reason. It's Matt Smith's last episode as the Doctor, more specifically, his regeneration scene and what he says.

Any moment now, he’s a coming, The Doctor and I always will be. But times change and so must I. We all change, when you think about it.

We are all different people all through our lives and that's okay, that's good you've got to keep moving so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.

I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear. I will always remember when The Doctor was me...

I'm not the Doctor, no matter how much I might wish I was sometimes, but it's not just him it is true for. I look back to who I was over the years. I'm not the same person I was when I was 5, 13, 16, or even 35. I am not the same person I was when I was raising my children, and in some ways I am sorry for that. I am stronger now in my beliefs than I was then, more. willing to stand for them. I am happier now, even with everything that is going on in my life right now, than I was then. I was in the middle of my battle with depression while they were growing up, and they saw parts of me I wish they would not have had to see. While I am sorry for it I also hope they learned from it so their lives are better.

Maybe the fact my birthday was only a few days ago has me thinking way too much, but thanks for letting me ramble.